So as you can see, not the best year for the books. There were moments of goodness and joy interspersed throughout. A week with a favorite niece and nephew. The honour of being asked to be a godmother not just once but twice. Wonderful conversations with my grandma. Being accepted into the grad program. And of course, my garden...my sanctuary. Those good moments seem so much sweeter. It is easy to be grateful for those more joyful moments but I still am trying to find gratitude for those moments where it was a struggle in the sadness and darkness. I hope to find it.
I want to end the year with hope for a better 2014. I thought about the Tennyson poem "Ring Out Wild Bells"
- Ring out, wild bells, to the wild sky,
- The flying cloud, the frosty light;
- The year is dying in the night;
- Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.
- Ring out the old, ring in the new,
- Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
- The year is going, let him go;
- Ring out the false, ring in the true.
- Ring out the grief that saps the mind,
- For those that here we see no more,
- Ring out the feud of rich and poor,
- Ring in redress to all mankind.
- Ring out a slowly dying cause,
- And ancient forms of party strife;
- Ring in the nobler modes of life,
- With sweeter manners, purer laws.
- Ring out the want, the care, the sin,
- The faithless coldness of the times;
- Ring out, ring out thy mournful rhymes,
- But ring the fuller minstrel in.
- Ring out false pride in place and blood,
- The civic slander and the spite;
- Ring in the love of truth and right,
- Ring in the common love of good.
- Ring out old shapes of foul disease,
- Ring out the narrowing lust of gold;
- Ring out the thousand wars of old,
- Ring in the thousand years of peace.
- Ring in the valiant man and free,
- The larger heart the kindlier hand;
- Ring out the darkness of the land,
- Ring in the Christ that is to be.
I think this poem echoes my thoughts so well. So to prepare for the end of 2013 and to really punctuate my intention, I am in the final countdown for a trip to East Africa. Truly a trip of a lifetime and I have been waiting impatiently for it all year. It will be epic and there will be pictures in January.
I am taking this vacation as a re-set for life in general. I know that life will continue to have struggles but my outlook can change and that is what I need.
Because I haven't really updated my blog since MARCH! What?! here are some shots of the year around the magic house...well, actually just my garden because that is all I managed to do in the last 9 months.
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| Dad and Jon move the deck stairs for me. |
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| I get handy... |
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| And build some raised beds |
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| This was taken with my ipad so the quality is bad but you can see the growth |
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| The river by my house with the fall colors...another season gone |
